Identity

So, I know I said I would update about Prague and Berlin, but this seems more important since it is a part of the experience of being in these places. I will start at the beginning. I went to wash dishes in the communal kitchen and it just so happens that my neighbor was there cooking. He is like me in the way that his parents are from Turkey and he was born in Austria, whereas I was born in the USA and my parents are from Mexico. We talked about identity, racism and discrimination, and how we are seen by society at large. We found out that a lot of things are the same. For example when he goes to Turkey people there say he is Austrian, but when he is in Austria people here say he is Turkish. It is the same for me. When I got to Mexico people there call me "Gringa," "Pocha," or American, but when I am in the USA I am called Mexican. I also asked him about his experience in school. I was wondering if it was the same as mine, which was getting taught Spanish first then English and he told me no. Here they just hammer German into you. He told me that it's only until recently that that they have figured out that one must learn his or her mother language first and then move on to the other language. We also talked about the criminalization of Turkish people in Austria and the criminalization of Latinas/os in the USA. It surprised me how many things are the same between us and them. He said that they are seen as a virus here and I would also agree that we are seen the same way in the USA. By the way this entire conversation happened in German!
Then I came back to my room and found my friend Thaddeus online. I told him about the conversation I had with my neighbor. Then we started talking about this further and a few interesting quotes came out of this conversation which can be found on Facebook. A lot of what I am going to say came out of this conversation with him. I told him one of the things I have noticed here and that I have also mentioned to other people, including my neighbors, is that it’s weird for me to be here in Vienna and not feel like a target. The Turkish are to Austria as Mexicans are to the USA. I will speak here about Mexicans/Mexican Americans because that is what I know best and that is really what I experience in the USA. I know what it is like to be Mexican within the context of the USA. What I don't know is what it means to Mexican in Austria. Like I said it's different because I'm not a part of the target group; therefore, I don't feel like a target. I am not criminalized in this country; at least I don't feel that I am. The way my friend Thaddeus described it is that I moved up into the privileged group here. I am not going to lie; it is nice not feeling like a target here, but it is weird. I am trying to figure out the rules but I can't. I know the rules in the USA. I need to know them they ensure survival. I understand some of them in Mexico, but I don't know all of them. Here I just don't know. I guess here rules can be seen as obstacles and barriers. I know what obstacles and barriers exist for me in the U.S., I am familiar with them in Mexico, but here since in a way I am in a position of privilege I don't know what they are. I am not used to being in a position of privilege, at least in this aspect if privilege, so I may be trying to find rules, obstacles, and/or barriers that may not exist, or that aren't as abundant as I am used to.
Another identity thing I ran into here is the "American Identity." It literally kills me on the inside, when I am with in a big group of students from UIUC and when they ask someone where we are from and that person says, “We’re American." The reason it bothers me so much is that saying just "American" does not encompass what I am and who I am. It doesn't adequately describe my position within the USA. It doesn't cover my experience. I mean, that word "American" I feel does not really include me. It doesn't say anything about me. When I first got here I used to say that I was Mexican American. I wasn't sure if people would understand Chicana or Latina, and I couldn't just say Mexican like I do in the USA, because that would imply I was born and raised in Mexico, which is not correct. Then I figured out that when I said Mexican American I was actually saying that I come from the continent of the Americas (North, South, and Central), but from the country Mexico. Keep in mind this was in German within the context of the German language. Now I just say I was born in the USA, but my parents are from Mexico and I am somewhere in the middle. And the cool thing about this is that I can say this in German, maybe not grammatically correct German, but I get my point across.
Also, when you say you are American you also carry the stereotypes associated with that identity, and let me tell you the stereotypes about Americans are not good. I mean, yes I am used to carrying stereotypes (good and bad) around. It comes with the territory whether I like it or not. When I identify as Mexican, Latina, or Chicana, I feel I carry everything those identities encompass. Not that I know everything, but I mean talking about good or bad stereotypes, prejudices, and other things. I feel like I don't carry that here, which is a load off my back. So when it comes to the negative stereotypes that are associated with the "American Identity" I opt out. I don't want to carry that stereotype, especially since I feel it is not really mine. I'll clarify this further. The impression that I have gotten here is that most people seem to still think of Americans as white and that does not include me, so that is why I feel the stereotype does not include me. I guess part of me feels this: "Let them carry their own stereotype for once. I carry enough."
I am still grappling with my own identity within the context of USA and Mexico. I am still trying to figure things out. This is why answering the question “Where are you from?" is hard. That's a complex answer. The problem is people don't always want a complex answer. They want a simple one, which is sometimes just not good enough. Like I said to Thaddeus complexity defines us. This is where the Facebook quotes come in :). So please comment, as always constructive criticism is always appreciated. Just no hate mail.

Getting to Prague

So yeah I went to Prague this past weekend, but I swear I have some of the worst luck traveling. So I will warn you don’t travel with me, because maybe not everything, but a lot of things will go wrong. Well the first thing it was kind of my friend and mine’s fault. We were late to the bus, but I mean we had class and our professor did not let us out early enough, so we ended up running to the bus station and when we got there we just saw the bus go by. My friend tried to get her roommate to tell the bus driver to wait for us like two minutes, but it wasn’t until later (yesterday) that we found out from her roommate that the bus driver didn’t speak English. Yeah, that could be a reason why the bus driver did not wait, or understand my friend when she was yelling at him or her over the phone. Then we could either take the next bus to Prague or try to see when the train left.

We decided to check out the train tickets and they were 60 Euros per person just one way, but with the discount they told us 21 Euros. Lucky me I forgot my discount card at the dorm. We got the time tables for when the next train as leaving to Prague and there was one in 48 minutes and then another in like 2 hours. So we decided to go check out the bus station and see our options there. We both knew from the internet that the next bus was sold out and that the next available one was at like 6 pm which meant we were going to get to Prague at 11 pm. We walked around for a bit and found the place we were supposed to wait for the bus but no bus station, so we were just like screw it let’s take the train.We were at Pratestern (U2 Purple). The plan was that my friend would head out to the U Bahn stop Landstrasse in Simmering, which is a Ubahn (like the subway) stop on the U3 line (Orange), and I would go back to the dorm (Heilegenstadt stop) and get my card. We had less than two hours to do this. So I came back, got my card, and left. Finally, I get to the station meet up my friend and we both headed to Simmering. We get to Simmering and we can’t buy our tickets on the automatic ticket thing, because Prague is not listed as one of the destinations. Then we talk to a lady and she tells us to head back to Landstrasse where someone can help us, so we head back and by this time we had like an hour before the next train left. We get to Landstrasse and find the ticket place and buy our tickets, which were 20 Euros more expensive than we were told, but by this time we were like whatever let’s just go. We went back to Simmering and bought food, because both of us hadn’t had time to eat that day. My friend had had chocolate and I had had a granola bar and a pear. We finally get on the train and head to Prague. Yay!!!

Now for part 2! We get to Prague, which is a really pretty city seriously. If anyone comes to Europe they have to come to Prague. We find our way to our hostel, which we missed along the way because we were distracted by the pretty architecture, and my friend checks in and everything is fine. Then I try to check in and I wrote down the confirmation number, but the lady there said that that’s useless and that she needs a name. I give her my name and she said that I wasn’t on there. I write down my name and she said, “Nope you are not on here and there is no more room.” I was like, “What?” I told the lady that I got a confirmation email, that where was I supposed to stay, and that if there was someone else I could speak too. She told me that it was not her fault and that I had to talk to the people where I booked it from. She was telling me to go stay in a hotel, or somewhere else. I was telling her if I could get my deposit back then. There were people there waiting to get checked in so she told me to wait, and in the mean time I went on one of the computers and pulled out the confirmation email. Other people had some problems too. There were some very nice Brazilians there who were having some trouble too. She was talking on the phone to someone and she got the Brazilians checked in. I sent her my confirmation email and then she said my name appeared and I got a room. The room I got was really nice! (Picture on top: My bed!) So in the end things worked out.

On the way back we got on the bus and my friend somehow had printed out my confirmation email for the bus on the way back, so she didn’t have hers and the person check in us in told us that if she couldn’t find her confirmation letter then it wasn’t valid. At this point I was like why? Why? Why? Why? Thank whatever deity exists up there, for the IPhone and Wi-Fi, because that enabled my friend to find her confirmation ticket!

Apart from all this Prague was great. We walked around all day and say all the cites, which included castles and churches. There is also this really cool clock there. I’m too lazy to keep writing I’ll put up another post, which says what we did in Prague.